Financial Depression

As year end approached, my thoughts turned to my own financial predicament over the last twelve months. Had the sabbatical cost me too much, had I double dipped, was I lacking interest in all things economic? With my assets spread variously throughout the banking system, I needed to find out what I had in the biscuit barrel and consolidate.

My first port of call was Nationwide, where I had a postal account. I don't really understand why I had a postal account, as it seems impossible to access any money, or indeed find out anything about the account. It was so long since I had last checked that I had no idea what was in there, or as it turned out, what my pin number was. The tiny man hiding in the hole in the wall said I failed to enter my pin correctly three times, despite me only entering it twice, and he held on to my card. This was an ominous start, and I should have given up there and then, but I plodded onwards towards the depths of financial despair.

The man at the customer services stand said I would have to return the following day to collect my card, bringing with me some form of ID to arrange for a new pin to be sent to me. Since I was in possession of ID he said we could do that there and then, but the ID had an old address on it, so that was, in fact, not possible after all. He very helpfully pointed out that, since it's a postal account, I need neither the card nor the pin to arrange a transfer of funds. However, without knowing my balance, I had no idea how much I could transfer, and of course he could not tell me my balance as it was a postal account, I had no card, and my ID had an old address on it.

The system said no, and I was unable to think of a way to beat the system. Worse still I could foresee the same passage of events occurring every year. So in a flash of inspiration I closed the account. It seemed the most sensible thing to do. It was that or murder the man at customer services. 

Some days later a cheque arrived at my house, detailing the exact amount of money I had previously held, just days before, in my now defunct postal account. This was paid directly into my bank account, meaning I can access it without card from a host of convenient locations, and checking my balance from all manner of portable electronic devices as my whim dictates. Financial karma had been restored, and I have regained my interest.